Exercise

Yesterday we went to free play at Gymboree in hopes that the big room wouldn't be so novel and Demon would stay in music class today. He was worn out by the end slipped and twisted his ankle, or pinched his toes or something. He was fine, but had a huge tantrum, and then was limping all around going, "ow ow ow." Of course, it was right at the end, so we had to leave. I packed Bug all up and out we went. In the middle of the street he pulls out the "ow ow ow" and sits down. I had to pick him up and carry him!! So here I am carrying my 35lb (or so) toddler a 10lb infant in a 40lb pumpkin seat for a block and a half. We walked by a gym with big windows and people on treadmills. I thought, "HA!"


I'm fat. I've had 2 kids in under 2 years, the last a mere 6 weeks ago. I'm working on losing weight, but it's a slow process. I hate gyms, but I'd kill for some time on the treadmill. (It'd be easier if I only had to kill someone to get it, or better yet, kill someone to be thin. As it is I'll have to work instead)  The gym was one of those "women's gyms."  I'd been thinking maybe I should join and go work out there. As I was struggling down the street with my load of children it occurred to me that wasn't going to happen. Also, that if just walking was going to work that walking and carrying an extra 85lbs should work even better. Maybe I just have to practice carrying both kids for further and further distances. Every time I have to carry both of them, or even just my super tall toddler, I think, "you think I'd be thinner."  It seems to me that carrying around all that extra weight and chasing a toddler on a never ending basis would cause you to lose weight. Not so much so. 

A Good Day to Die

My youngest brother is 13yrs younger then me. He was always my little buddy. When I would visit, we would go to the park. My step mom would take the older two kids, and I'd spend a lot of time with my youngest brother. People used to give me the dirtiest looks. I suppose I looked old enough to be his (unwed, teenage) mother. I always thought it was funny. When he was about the age Demon is now he had huge blond curls and would follow me everywhere, and do whatever I did. I thought it was sweet. (I was around 15 at the time and getting out of my self centered teenage idiocy.)

When he was 5 and i would visit I would stay in the guest room in the basement down the hall from the playroom. He used to love Quake. Which was like the 2nd generation of Doom. (And for those of you living under a rock for the last 20yrs, Doom was a gruesome first person shooter) He used to turn the volume on the computer speakers all the way up. ALL the way up. No matter where I'd set it the night before, he'd come down, turn the nob all the way up, and the walls would shake.  One morning I got up to ask him to turn it down, he asked me if I'd like to play. I told him I didn't know how to play. He said, "I'll teach you."

So, however early it was in my 18yr old world, I thought this was an interesting opportunity. What would a 5yr old teach me about computer games? This is how you walk? Shoot, look, jump, whatever? He was so darn cute though, and clearly wanted to play with me, I couldn't walk away. So I sat down with a chuckle, he climbed in my lap, and we started up the game. 

As soon as the game loads he goes, "ok, ok, ok, ok, ok, what you do is: you push this button ~ *click* and type 'it's a good day to die'"  *tappity tappity *itsagooddaytodie*  

...and here my brain stalled out

For those of you living under that rock what my 5yr old little brother had just done was turn on God Mode. This allows you to play the game without taking any damage. It's a cheat, a code that allows you to win.

So, here, my first instruction from a 5yr old was to cheat. Not that I'm completely opposed to it in 1 player games, but it's usually not my first plan of attack.

So, all these ideas crashed into my head at once. He'd just cheated, he, apparently, ALWAYS cheated, was he that bloodthirsty? plus, a 5yr old shouldn't be able to say, "it's a good day to die," much less SPELL IT. I wasn't sure if I should be horrified or proud. Was he a genius? A bloodthirsty little killer waiting to happen?

So here I am staring at him, mouth hanging open, and he looks up at me with his adorable, cherubic 5yr old face, and huge eyes, and says, "now they can't hurt you," and my brain shifted back into gear.

He's not playing to win, he's not a bloodthirsty little person, he has no clue what he's just put into the computer, not really. All he knows is that he's found magic armor. These magic words stop everything scary in the game from hurting you, therefor rending it not scary anymore. He's taken a game, acclaimed at the time for it's realism and gore, and made it harmless to his 5yr old self. And his first instruction to me is to put on the magic armor, so nothing can hurt me either. 

He played a lot of bloody games during his early childhood. I think about that now as I struggle with what my son will or will not watch, and what he, eventually, will or will not play as far as games are concerned. My youngest brother is one of the best gamers I know (my middle brother being the other best gamer I know.) He's also one of the most gentle souls I've ever met. He is kind, and caring, and I think still trying to protect everyone. I remember him and his 5yr old magic armor a lot. i remember my shock as he typed, "it's a good day to die" into the computer, and my revelation at what it meant to him, and I always look a little closer at children. Usually there is innocence under every action.